


Christmas in Kirkwall

by quinnlocke



Category: Dragon Age II
Genre: F/M, Modern AU, One Shot, Secret Santa Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-23
Updated: 2015-12-23
Packaged: 2018-05-08 17:37:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,439
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5506775
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quinnlocke/pseuds/quinnlocke
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>My contribution to FenHawke Secret Santa.<br/>Jumpforjo expressed a love for coffee shop AU's and an idea popped into my head for a reunion fic.<br/>Set during Christmas, Hawke is back in town for the holidays and runs into Fenris after not seeing him for three years.<br/></p>
            </blockquote>





	Christmas in Kirkwall

**Author's Note:**

  * For [jumpforjo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/jumpforjo/gifts).



She was back in Kirkwall for the holidays at her mother’s insistence. Bethany was eight months pregnant with her second child and couldn’t make the trip down to Ferelden. Hawke would have preferred to just stay home and spend Christmas alone rather than come back. Too many memories in the city, some very dear to her heart. Others made her hate every step she took through Lowtown.

Not much had changed over the last three years. The bells in the chantry still rung out the hours, they could be heard even from where she was. The Hanged Man never closed its doors and the evening drunks were heading home as the midnight ones strolled in. she had half a mind to join them but decided against it. She had left her mothers house with the sole purpose of finding a quiet place to finish her work and escape the sounds of her nephews squalling through the night. The little one had the colic and nothing could be done to soothe him.

She was about to give up on finding any sort of place to have a quiet moment when she saw a shop front she didn’t recognize. Bodahn’s Brew, the neon sign featured a happy looking cup of coffee and Hawke breathed a sigh of relief at seeing a twenty four hours sign on the window. An all night coffee shop, the Maker truly did smile upon her. She stepped inside and ordered a large Orlesian Vanilla coffee and settled herself down at a table. She pulled out her laptop and checked through her emails. A couple from Isabela and Varric, Christmas greetings no doubt. An email from Merrill and carver, spending their Christmas together in Rivain, lucky bastards. She finished reading through them and set to work on her next article for The Denerim Daily. 

She was the newspapers travel writer, when her editor had found out she would be spending her holiday with family she asked for an article about how Kirkwall brought in tourists. An expose on how Christmas is celebrated in the Free Marches. Less dogs more alcohol Hawke thought to herself bitterly. 

“Hawke?” Oh that voice. She knew that voice. Even three years later that voice never failed to make her tremble. She looked up to see the same green eyes that had once taken her breath away. The white hair, now grown long and pulled back in a ponytail. The white lines on his face slightly faded but still a striking contrast to his bronze skin. Three years gone and he was still the most beautiful person she had ever laid eyes on.

“It really is you.” he said. She smiled and gestured for him to sit and join her.

Three years was a long time to be apart from someone. They spent hours talking about where their lives had gone. He had returned to Tevinter briefly to testify against his former boss, Danarius, on tax evasion, kidnapping and murder. Now he was a freelance photographer, sending in his works to various magazines across Thedas. She told him of her travels as well. As they compared lives they noticed each time she had been somewhere he was just days from arriving as well. Over the years they had managed to cross paths and yet never saw one another. 

The shadow of what they once had hung over them yet neither would speak of it. He had left and she had let him. The shadows of his past never were far away and he allowed them to direct his every move and choice.

“I’m glad to hear you finally went back. It must have been such a weight of your shoulders to finally face him. To finally see him brought to justice.”

“It was and I wish I had not waited as long as I did. But I let my fear guide me for too long and I couldn’t take it anymore. I was the only one who could testify, so I did.”

As he spoke more of his work she couldn’t help notice a spot of red on his right arm. Just under the sleeve. She told herself she was imagining things. He wouldn’t still be wearing that old thing. It had been nothing when she gave it to him, a simple scrap of red ribbon she tied around his wrist. “They say you should tie a red string around your finger to remind yourself not to forget something. Now you’ll never forget me.” she had said that to him one night when he spoke of his fear of forgetting what was important in life.

“Hawke, we have never spoken properly about what happened.”

“You weren’t exactly responsive.” He had been dead silent actually. She had begged and pleaded with him to drop whatever walls he held around himself. Told him over and over again she would love him no matter who he was or what he did in the past. Yet he never could open himself to her fully, never gave her all of himself. She had known he had testified against Danarius, Varric sent her an article about it, accompanied by a note suggesting she reach out to him. But she didn’t, if he wanted to come back to her he would. But he never did.

“I was a fool and a coward. You were right; I let everything about my past define me. Danarius wasn’t the one holding me back, it was all me. If I could go back to that night I never would have left. I would have stayed given you everything. Told you how I felt no matter the consequences.”

“It’s no good dwelling on the past Fenris. That’s what got you into trouble in the first place.” She kept her face a mask of no emotion. She had learned to never give away her feelings, a defense mechanism brought on by the man sitting in front of her. He may very well be pouring his heart out to her but she could not let him in. no one could be let in, not anymore.

“I’m just glad I got to see you again and tell you I’m sorry.” He lifted his hand to brush his hair out of his face and his sleeve moved. She could see now the ribbon tied around his wrist clear as day, he still wore it. She reached out her hand and took his wrist lifting his sleeve all the way to reveal it.

“You still have it?” she said in complete disbelief. The shock of seeing it destroying her resolve. She felt her eyes begin to water and she pulled away drying them quickly.

“You gave it to me so I would never forget you. Why would I not keep it?”

“I have to go.” She said quickly grabbing her things and rushing out the door. He tried to reach for her but she brushed him away. She burst out into the night air and began walking as fast as she could. She had made it four blocks when she realized she had left her purse behind. Cursing she turned back around and hoped he had decided to leave as well. She kept her head down and did her best to stop crying. Why did he do this to her? How could he still have such an impact on her? 

“You forgot your purse.” He said walking towards her and she looked up at him. He was so close she could see the small flecks of gold in his eyes. She had once spent an entire night memorizing those eyes. Those eyes looked sad now. Sad with the realization that this may be the last time he saw her. He had waited too long and now it was too late to make amends for what he had done.

“Fenris.” she said her voice barely a whisper and her hands trembled as she lifted them towards his face. He let her cradle his head between her hands and closed his eyes with a soft smile on his lips. 

“Hawke.” He whispered back.

“If you don’t kiss me now I.” her words were cut off as his lips crashed into hers. There was no hesitation just the urgency of needing to be connected right at that very moment. She felt tears on her face and realized they were his as well as hers. There would be time later to talk, to figure out where they stood. Now all she cared for was to be in his arms as he gave her what he could not all those years ago, all of himself.

**Author's Note:**

> So having never done this before I've got to say writing for someone else was a joy. I look forward to participating in these more often. I hope you enjoyed it as well. Merry Christmas.  
> For a modern AU I went with the idea that Danarius was a sort of criminal boss and Fenris was a former employee who got away but lives with the guilt of knowing he was the only one who could bring him to justice.


End file.
